Police in Cornelius, Oregon, arrrrgh on the lookout for a landlubber who got away with a decent booty after breaking into a pub in Washington County wearing a pirate mask complete with a fake eye patch, a parrot, and a beard. According to The Oregonian, the scallywag broke into the Last Lap Pub on the…
Planet Fitness claims to be a “Judgement Free Zone,” but as a man in Massachusetts learned, judgment-free doesn’t mean you won’t be arrested for getting naked and doing yoga. According to USA Today, Eric M. Stagno, 34, was charged with indecent exposure, lewdness and disorderly conduct after the police were called when he stripped naked and posted…
Ahhh, that beautiful moment when life imitates art. A man in Memphis, Tennessee, recently attempted the ol’ Two-Timer Date trope popular in sitcoms and romantic comedies. According to nbcmiami.com, while on a date with one woman, Kelton Griffin stole her car to drive to another date with another woman. After stopping at a gas station, Griffin…
“Another day another bender. No retreat no surrender.” Apparently, a man in Florida took this common drinking cheers too literally. According to local10.com, after being pulled over on suspicion of drunk driving, Daryl Royal Riedel, 48, got out of the car, opened a beer, raised it in the air, and chugged it in front of the…
Uh oh, urine trouble! According to nwfdailynews.com, a 30-year-old man in Fort Walton Beach, Florida, was arrested yesterday after a police officer witnessed him stumbling out of a residence and watering the neighbor’s car. A blatant case of ICUP, the officer confronted the man and told him to cover himself and sit on the ground. However,…
O Austin Michael Jackson, 31, he who “may be Jesus,” the Confused Christ, the Almighty Arsonist, Creator of Combustion, the Flaming First Begotten, the Father of Fire, Blessed Burning Bread of Life. They say fire brings new life, but one Indiana homeowner wasn’t about to fall prey to the actions of this maybe Messiah. According…
In the most realistic and bizarre case of “See ya later, alligator,” two people entered a Wawa convenience store in Lakewood Ranch, Florida, and departed sans alligator. Maybe the alligator was hungry. Maybe it asked for a ride. Or maybe the perp derps were just trying to return it to its natural habitat (everyone knows…
Another day, another doo doo. According to NBC10, a road rage incident got out of hand when one of the men arguing defecated in the road. Henry George Weaver—a retired farmer from New Tripoli, PA—turned Route 309 into the Hershey Highway (you try using that reference two weeks in a row!) when, as he claims,…
In Brisbane, Australia, the notorious “poo jogger” has finally been caught! After jogging down the Hershey Highway for almost a year, Douglas Macintosh’s luck has crapped out, as neighbors saw this as not only a fecal matter but a public one as well. Determined to catch this log jogger, the community hatched a plan. One neighbor…
They say pointing your finger is rude, but it’s also a pretty lousy way to try to rob a convenience store. According to SFGate, a 7-Eleven store in Bonita Springs, Florida, was the victim of an attempted robbery when a man with a shirt over his head pointed his finger like a gun and demanded…
