Ceramic Squirrel Wonders What He Ever Did To Deserve This

Artist's fascimile of the weapon in question—doesn't the expression scream, “Why the hell did you have to drag me into it?”

A South Carolina woman has been charged with domestic abuse after beating and stabbing a man with a ceramic squirrel in a fit of anger when he returned home early Christmas without beer, according to South Carolina authorities.

Deputies found a man covered with blood when they arrived at Helen Williams' North Charleston, S.C. home early Wednesday morning, the Charleston County Sheriff's office said in a report.

Williams, 44, told investigators the man fell and cut himself, but couldn't explain why her hands and clothes were also bloody.

Beerlessness may seem like a good excuse, but when the trust is broken with your tchotchke, not to mention your common-law husband, it's not quickly re-earned.

Via the San Jose Mercury News (and everywhere else).


  1. Laura K. Curtis

    Umm…I am pretty sure that when I was about 12 I had that exact squirrel.

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