Military Joyride: Man Steals Tank, Crashes through Store Window, Steals Bottle of Wine

Let’s play a game: Russia or Florida?

Recently, a drunk man stole a tank from a military base, drove it through the streets, crashed it through a grocery store, got out of the tank, walked around in the aisles, and tried to steal a bottle of wine before the police finally arrested him.

If it weren’t for the snow in the picture above, the Sunshine State would have been a perfectly reasonable answer (and I wouldn’t be surprised if you could do a quick Google search and find a similar story). But alas, Russia is in the news again—this time, at least, for hilarious reasons.

According to The Guardian, the man stole the armored vehicle from a military driving school in Apatity, Russia, on Wednesday. Sounds like a dream joyride to me—but then again, I am from Florida…