Things I learned from “The Walking Dead” Season 3 finale: how to spell “anticlimactic” and that the inability to multitask may cost you your life in the Zombie Apocalypse.

We open with an extreme closeup on the Governor’s remaining eye; he’s beating up Milton, blaming him for burning the zombies at the pit, because Merle apparently killed eight of the Governor’s soldiers last week. (Go Merle!) The Governor tells Milton that his philosophy is “you kill or you die.” Milton asks the Governor what his daughter would think and the Governor admits that she’d be afraid. “But if I’d been like this from the start, she’d be alive today.”

Milton asks whether the Governor killed Andrea, so the Governor throws Milton into the room with her. He orders Milton to grab the torture tools on the table behind Andrea, and Milton accidentally on purpose drops a pair of pliers in the shadow of the chair. Then the Governor hands Milton a big knife and orders him to kill Andrea. “There’s no way you’re leaving this room without doing this.”

[Breaking up is hard to do]

We open with Raylan bragging to a now visibly pregnant Winona about the successful conclusion of the Drew Thompson case. Winona could not be less interested; she just wants to know whether Raylan could please sign and return the papers she sent him a week ago that secure their baby’s future if anything happens to either one of them. That’s not ominous at all.

Raylan walks in to the applause of the entire Marshal team and asks them to quiet down as he realizes that Winona’s told him their baby is a girl. Awww! I think Raylan and I are both glad the Givens line won’t have the opportunity to carry on its twisted father-son relationships into another generation.

[Of course, fathers and daughters have their own issues...]

We open with Rick having made his decision to sacrifice Michonne in the hopes that the Governor will keep his word to eave the prison alone. “It ain’t us,” Daryl pleads with him, but ever the good soldier, stops protesting once it’s clear Rick’s decision is made.

Rick says that they need “someone else” to carry out this betrayal. Merle, the proxy in question, is busy ripping up prison mattresses with his knife-hand, looking for dope.

There are ***SPOILERS AHEAD*** (and monsters)!!

[Get on with your bad self, Merle!]

Last night, “Justified” served up several classic Western tropes in a clever, modernized disguise and made a strong case for being the best-written show currently airing on TV. “Decoy” worked both as a suspenseful heist/caper story and as a character-driven episode that deepened the relationships between Raylan and Boyd, Colton and Tim, and the late Arlo and Shelby/Drew. We also learned that people underestimate Constable Bob at their peril and that Art is the most awesome Marshal who ever drew breath.

We open with Nicky Augustine’s helicopter hovering overhead, and my question about why Art didn’t call for a chopper of his own is answered—Lexington Air Ops is sending a helicopter to pick up the Marshals and Drew. It’s unclear, though, whether it will arrive before the Detroit baddies do.

Speaking of baddies, Wynn Duffy’s abrupt departure has left Boyd holding the empty Panamian diplomatic bag, as it were, for the failure to deliver Drew to Nicky Augustine. Nicky remarks on Boyd’s above-average dentistry before Nicky’s henchman Yolo punches Boyd till one of Boyd’s perfect teeth falls out. Nicky indulges in an elaborate metaphor involving the sacrifice of Isaac; the gist of it is that Theo Tonin is God and he wants Drew, and Boyd needs to deliver him.

[Speaking of hubris...]

Andrea was one of my favorite characters from the first two seasons of The Walking Dead, but between her often smug self-righteousness and her willful blindness to the Governor’s true nature, it’s been a rough ride for Andrea fans in Season 3. Lately every time she’s been onscreen, I’ve imagined a choir of nuns singing “How do you solve a problem like Andrea?”

We got the answer last night: make Andrea the Governor’s “Prey”, instead of his paramour and the audience will root for her again. I can’t speak for everyone, but it worked for me!

The episode opens with a flashback of Michonne and Andrea by a fire. Michonne’s pet zombies are chained to a tree; Andrea asks if Michonne’s zombie pets were once people she loved and Michonne breaks out a few of her words to say that “they deserved what they got. They weren’t human to begin with.”

[Define “human?”]

Everyone - Marshals, criminals, stray dogs - was out to “get Drew” in last night’s episode of Justified.

We open at Shelby’s house with Tim, Raylan and the Kentucky state police searching Shelby’s effects. Boyd, who came looking for Ellen May, is under arrest, although he argues that the Marshals have no reason to hold him. Boyd tells Raylan that he should have stayed on the other side of the criminal line with Boyd and Arlo. “You’d still be able to shoot people and be an asshole, your two favorite activities. Except you would be a rich asshole.” Raylan demurs saying that he’d either be in prison or dead, although he doesn’t deny his enjoyment of shooting and being an asshole. Heh!

Rachel arrives, saying that Art sent her to make sure Tim and Raylan don’t do anything rash or stupid. I love it when all the Marshals are together.

[But it's not just about the Marshals]

Last week on The Walking Dead, Andrew Lincoln and Lennie James proved that two people talking in a room in the midst of the zombie apocalypse could be harrowing, gripping drama; this week, two people talking in a room reminded me too much of season 2, in which various characters would sit around and talk about an issue, then talk about it some more, and then come back for another discussion. Still, there were some things I enjoyed about the episode, including having some of the prison group connect with the Woodbury-ites, and seeing Merle be Merle, which is always a treat.

We open with Daryl, Rick, and Hershel arriving for a parlay with the Governor in an old warehouse amidst a bunch of oil drums that provide the perfect cover for an ambush.

The Governor is already at the warehouse as Rick walks in; he tries to take credit for not killing everyone at the prison when he had the chance and takes off his holster to show that he’s negotiating in “good faith.” I do not think those words mean what the Governor thinks they mean. Rick wisely holds onto his weapon, because a different camera angle reveals that the Governor has already placed a pistol under the table. I’m sure the instant Rick disarmed, the Governor would have killed him.

[We are no longer shocked by the Governor’s behavior...]

This week’s episode of Justified was all about resurrection (Ellen May) and betrayal (Colt), plus the real Drew Thompson finally stood up!

We open with Marshal Tim pensively surveying the bodies at Dealer Dave’s place. Tim’s friend Mark survived his gunshot wound long enough to text the word “Bagram” to Tim. Tim plays dumb for the cop who’s questioning him, just saying that Bagram was the airbase at which he and Mark were stationed in Afghanistan but we know from the previouslies that Colt told Tim he was at the VA for “Bagram lung.”

Meanwhile, ex-Sheriff Hunter is being transferred to SuperMax for the murder of Arlo Givens; that is, until his accompanying U.S. Marshal Dunlop transfers him to the custody Raylan Givens instead. Art and I both wonder how Raylan talked his hapless colleague into that enormous error in judgment. Art orders Tim to let Raylan know that if Hunter doesn’t show up at the Leoville SuperMax in one piece both Art and Raylan will be ex-U.S. Marshals.

Tim calls Raylan, but instead of delivering Art’s hilarious diatribe, Tim offers his assistance, specifically in poking around the Crowder place. Raylan refuses, but I think we all know that won’t stop Marshal Tim.

[Of course not!]

The most compelling aspect of post-apocalyptic stories are the twin questions of how the survivors navigate the changed circumstances of their world and whether it is possible to hold onto the qualities we define as “humanity” and still survive. The Walking Dead has, from the beginning, addressed those questions, with varying degrees of success and preachiness, but rarely has it done so as well as in last night’s episode, “Clear.”

We open with Michonne, Rick, and Carl on the supply run that Rick mentioned at the end of the last episode. They zoom past a sign that says “Erin, we tried for Stone Mountain” and then pass a human on the side of the road, who shouts for them to pick him up. They don’t even slow down, and no one discusses the decision.

At the site of a giant car wreck, their car stalls in the mud; a group of zombies is immediately drawn to the hard-shelled, flesh-filled treat of the car (and one of them wears a bracelet that says “Erin.” Heh! But also, ouch!).

[We can appreciate the dark humor in that...]

We open right after the preceding episode, with Raylan, whose offer of a deal for Drew Thompson was soundly rejected by Arlo, waiting to make the same offer to ex-Harlan County sheriff Hunter.

Hunter (played by the wonderful, versatile Brent Sexton) walks in, asking Raylan “Hasn’t anybody killed you yet?” Raylan tells him not to sound so disappointed. Heh! Hunter feigns ignorance about Drew Thompson’s fate, particularly in light of Josiah Cairn’s missing foot, even when Raylan mentions the sweet deal at Club Fed, possibly in Yankton (a shoutout to Deadwood fans who know that all the town’s more irritating bureaucratic evils emanated from Yankton.)

Sheriff Hunter, though a criminal, isn’t a stupid one. He recognizes that Raylan wants to screw with Arlo, which is why he’s offering Hunter the deal instead.

[Fathers and sons]

In the prison, a debate rages about whether to stay put and fight the Governor or to flee. To my surprise and delight, Daryl, Rick, and Merle are all back inside; I figured the show wouldn’t lose the opportunity to keep our groups separate for a while, but I guess three badasses such as Rick Grimes and the Dixon brothers could probably fight their way through a field full of Walkers. Also, to be honest, Rick, Daryl, and Merle probably smell very much like the zombies at this point. They are all in desperate need of baths.

Back to the debate: Herschel insists that they should leave the prison; Glenn backs up Rick’s decision to stay; and Merle—who’s locked away separately but within earshot of the group—tells them that they lost their chance to leave anyway.

Daryl says he isn’t afraid of the Governor, and Merle is all “you really should be!” Merle points out that the Governor has both the guns and the numbers on his side; he can just starve out the prison folks if he wants to. Good old Merle is always so upbeat!

Rick begins to walk away, and Herschel just can’t take it any more. He yells at Rick that “now is not the time.” If this isn’t a democracy but a Ricktatorship, then Rick needs to be there and actually lead.

Herschel’s words have apparently had some effect on Rick because we see him next with binoculars scouting the woods beyond the prison. For an instant, he sees the flash of something white in the woods. Remember, Rick, NOW IS NOT THE TIME! Carl has followed Rick and tells him that he should stop being the leader, and let Herschel and Daryl handle things because Rick deserves a rest. Even the Pope gets to resign nowadays, so Rick can have a temporary leave of absence!

In Woodbury, Milton and the Governor are doing a census of fighting personnel. The Governor decides that 13-year-olds and up are able to fight (and although basically everything the Governor does or says is like fingernails on a blackboard for me, I think it probably wouldn’t hurt the kids to at least learn self-defense/zombie fighting 101—after all, Carl is pretty capable and I’m not sure if he even is 13 yet.)

[Preteen zombie fighting for the win!]

We open six days earlier, with Raylan delivering Jody Adair, the felon from the first episode, to his bounty hunter “friend with benefits” Sharon. (This means that the entire season so far has only been six days in show time, which is kind of amazing, when you think about it!) For plot purposes, Raylan loudly mentions to Sharon where he lives, so Jody can overhear.

As Sharon and her colleague drive away with Jody, their vehicle’s tire pops. The colleague goes to change the tire, while Sharon goes to answer a call of nature. A well-meaning bystander drives up behind the disabled van; I don’t know his name at this point, so I’ll just call him Paul Kinsey from Mad Men for now! Jody busts open the door of the van and strangles Sharon’s colleague with his handcuffs as Kinsey looks on in shock. I’m wondering why he doesn’t just drive away, and then we established that he’s actually in cahoots with Jody and was the person to disable the van. He doesn’t want to tell Jody that Sharon went off into the woods, but when Jody waves a gun at him he gives up her location easily. Jody goes off into the woods and shoots Sharon in the neck, though not before she gets a shot off at Jody as well.

[Alas, poor Sharon...]

The episode opens with Rick up on the fenced in catwalk with an automatic rifle. Rick continues to hallucinate his visions of Lori in a white dress. (As scary as Rick was hallucinating with a pistol last episode, it’s even worse that he’s wandering around with an automatic weapon. What if he sees one of his friends morph into Shane again?) Rick’s Lori-vision lures him farther from the prison, past Michonne who appears to be cured of her concussion and living in an overturned school bus in the grassy no-man’s-land between the inner and outer prison fences. Michonne watches Rick wander on, a look of bemused worry on her face. I’m sure she’s not going to say anything to the people inside the prison, though!

In Woodbury, order seems to have been restored, although I have no idea what happened to the folks who were trying to flee last episode. The episode implies that Andrea’s speech calmed everyone down, but I’m imagining that the Governor has begun a new collection with the would-be Woodbury defectors’ heads.

[Heads do roll...]

This week’s Justified opens with masked men plinking a piano key as a man in an armchair begs them to be quiet because his son is sleeping upstairs. One of the masked men speaks, revealing that he’s Boyd Crowder and that he believes the man in the armchair, Dell Heywood, is really Drew Thompson.

In a desperate attempt to prove his identity, Dell shows Boyd his box of personal papers, which contains, among other things, a hilariously awful poem that Dell wrote while he was in high school. The box also contains a newspaper clipping showing that Dell was a champion athlete as a 20-year-old senior, definitely ruling him out as a Drew suspect. Boyd warns Dell to keep his memory box close at hand because “you never know when someone else might want to drop by and reminisce.”

[Poor Boyd]

I’ve come to the conclusion that The Walking Dead is like a nursery rhyme I used to know about a girl with a curl on her forehead—when it’s good, it’s very, very good, and when it’s bad it’s horrid. Luckily, season 3 has, for the most part been very, very good, and the long-awaited episode 9 was another in a string of excellent episodes.

We’ve all been waiting since December to see whether the Brothers Dixon would add fratricide to their repertoire, or whether the Governor would summarily execute both of them. The episode opens in Woodbury’s fighting “arena,” where the crowd chants for the death of the Dixons. The only one who seems to take an opposing view is Andrea, who tries to reason with the Governor, somehow not realizing that “reason” and the Governor parted company months earlier. (You’d think the aquarium full of heads and the zombie daughter might have clued her in, but you’d think wrong.) The Governor tells Andrea that the people have spoken.

[After he worked them up into a killing rage, of course...]

After last week’s exploration of the disaster that is Raylan’s love-life, this week’s episode of Justified focused on the strongest aspects of the show: the specificity of the setting (Harlan County and its unique customs are as important to Justified as Baltimore was to The Wire); the parade of marvelous secondary characters (many of whom I recognized from Deadwood); and best of all, Raylan and Boyd Crowder’s undeniable onscreen chemistry as friends, enemies and occasionally uneasy allies.

“Kin” opens immediately in the aftermath of Ellen May’s disappearance from Colton’s Murder Wagon. Colton questions the gas station clerk, asking if he can watch their videotapes. The clerk, who is a lot braver than I’d be, reaches for the gun he keeps hidden under the counter. Instead of a shootout, though, Colton, who has a functioning brain under all that hair, pulls out his old Military Police ID and tells the clerk that Ellen May is a deserter that he’s taking back to Fort Knox. As Colton rewinds the gas station video, I take a moment to chuckle at the thought of Ellen May being in the military in any capacity. The videotapes reveal that Ellen May’s disappearance coincided with the arrival of a sheriff’s car at the gas station. Hmmmm! Can you say “state’s witness?” Because I think Colton can!

[Ellen Mae’s in deep]

After a couple of sublimely well-written episodes, I must confess that this week’s Justified was a bit disappointing. It was hard for me to care that much about Lindsey; mostly she made me miss Winona (I know, I know, hard to believe!). I also feel that Raylan needs a “win” of some sort soon; he’s falling apart (albeit in a fairly quiet and restrained way) in the aftermath of Winona’s exit and the knowledge that his father tried to kill him to save Boyd last season. I do like that the show often deconstructs Raylan’s “Cooler than Thou” Marshal persona, and the sad-sack, pathetic and even needy aspects of Raylan are important parts of him, but we also need to see him being great at his job sometimes, so we know why Art keeps him around. Maybe next week ...

The episode opens where last week’s left off, with Raylan and Rachel surveying the wreckage of Raylan’s apartment, ransacked by his girlfriend Lindsey and her not-at-all-ex-husband Randall. Raylan keeps desperately trying to figure out a way that Lindsey was coerced into scamming him for the money he kept out in his sock drawer, while Rachel sensibly points out that it looks like Lindsey was in on the whole thing from the start. “I thought she liked me,” Raylan says wistfully. I do a little cheer when Rachel offers to go along with Raylan and track Lindsey and Randall. Hurray for Rachel!

[Who wouldn’t go with Raylan, after all?]

This week on Justified, we learned that although a betrayal by a loved one may be sharper than a serpent’s tooth, a rattlesnake bite to the face may not always be fatal.

The episode opens with Boyd waiting for Cassie, whom he’s correctly sussed out as the power behind the Last Chance Holiness Church. Boyd offers Cassie a big bag of cash to direct the holiness at a different target, but Cassie’s holding out for a permanent home for her brother’s ministry, a home to be provided by Boyd Crowder’s money. She tells Boyd that he keeps misjudging Billy and Cassie because unlike everyone else in Harlan, they aren’t afraid of Boyd. In that case, Boyd tells her “we misjudged each other.” Sometimes I forget that Boyd isn’t just a charming autodidact, but the scary product of a family of criminals.

[And then he reminds you...]

As much as I love Raylan Givens (and Boyd Crowder), I think some of the best episodes of Justified occur when the rest of the talented cast is included in the storyline. It’s always great to see Raylan from the point of view of his coworkers; whenever Art Mullen is onscreen, pricking the shiny bubble of Raylan’s outsized personality, I’m convinced that he’s my favorite character on the show. I would have loved last night’s episode just for Art’s screentime and Art-icisms but I also got a terrific (and terrifically cast) Confederate-flag-flaunting welfare-check-scamming hillbilly clan, a reminder of Boyd Crowder’s vast erudition and knowledge of the Bible and the return of my favorite Dixie Mafiacrat, Wynn Duffy. It was all golden.

We open with Raylan and his blonde friend Lindsey finishing up what was evidently a good time for both of them. In the spirit of post-coital bliss, Raylan offers to handle the impending liquor delivery to Lindsey’s bar, where a burly fellow walks in and helps himself to a beer. He engages in some manly posturing with Raylan, who honestly looks a bit like an exhausted and disheveled twig next to Burly Man; Raylan sensibly declines to engage and the guy eventually leaves the bar.

[A guy walks into a bar...]